so i decided to split my livejournal. this is going to be for my personal updates and the other one "katykettles" is where i will be posting my poetry/ short stories/ creative shit. http://katykettles.livejournal.com/
so if you read this... add that one to your friends too.
-Katy
So I became a model...thats new....like litterally a model...I have 5 shoots booked for the next 4 weeks. These are photographers that contacted me...ushually when you start out you have to pay a photographer...some how I got lucky...they will do it free of charge.
see.....

that was taken about two days ago with this guy named Daniel....I am kind of like his project right now...we'll see how this all turns out.
It's funny, lately I have been wondering why I am so good at this modeling thing....and the only conclusion I came to is that my life wasn't meant for just me...but more for a public display. It explains why I don't care what people think of me...or why I don't feel stupid writing my feeling on the internet. I am not scared of the world knowing me....maybe because it was supposed to be my one love all along. For the past 4 years I was just kidding myself and when I had settled into "normalcy" not doing anything to entertain the world...I got taken out of it. My life wasn't so private anymore....now people are taking my picture and I feel more complete...like I got the medicine I was searching for. I guess I am finally where I am supposed to be...can't turn back now. Not until I some how make something so big that everyone can't stop talking about it....there is no privacy then.
I guess it was God's plan all along....I was meant for the world...and everytime I tried to do something for me....I got taken out of it, and hurt.
contemplativeAlright here's the 411 on all things happening in the big city and with me.
I left Greenpeace....for a number of reasons.
1. everything was temporary and it was stressful thnking I could lose my job at any moment
2. I was being fired for something they "overheard" in the gossip train and in my opinion they had no right to take action like they did.
3. After 4 weeks of talking to people I realized the method of getting members was litterally brainwashing, I was starting to feel like I was cheating people more then getting them to be part of something awesome....it became a numbers game with the quotas to meet and how many people could you stop this week. Everything was about the big numbers not on the individual and how they personally can't attribute to and gain from this organization. We say it is but at the end of the day they become a "15" or that "35" I had that day.
4. If I could say anything to the Greenpeace leaders it's that they should be learning how to keep their staff...they have the biggest drop rate out of any company I have seen. In my four weeks of being their I counted 20 people they hired and then never saw again and it sickened me because the economy is bad right now. The more people you fire, the more people you have that will hold a grudge against you. Eventually those numbers build up and people talk. Nobody likes to hear that their loved one got fired from Greenpeace because of wrong charges or because they simply couldn't "do this job". It was never the question that I couldn't do this job and it should have never been the question. Sometimes we get the short straw on more than one occaission....it's saying hi to the right person and sometimes even saying hi to 40 people you still don't find that one person who might just give a damn that the Boreal forst in Canada is being torn down every two second by the Kimberly-Clarke corporation or that the polar bears are losing their habitat and themselves.
Ending Statment on Greenpeace -
I don't want to discourage people from supporting their cause, because as most enviromental groups go...they are actually legit. The stuff they do does make an impact and does make change. The causes they support are real. I just hope that for the future they rethink their front lining tactics. Too many times following the set guidelines for my spiel I would feel like it took the heart out of my words, because it was designed to bring in money...to bring in profit to please the politics of it all. I also feel that until they change the turnover rate of people being fired...I can't as a personal choice support their cause.
(sorry Chalkey I know you were jealous that I was working for them)
- - Moving On from Old News - -
1. Name: Katy Kettles
2. Age: 20. unfortunately.
3. Location: hometown: Lansing, MI Now: Los Angeles, CA
4. Occupation: Greenpeace representative
5. Partner: none
6. Kids: not yet and probebly not in the next 7 years
7. Brothers/Sisters: Rich (21)...he;s in Gunnison, CA
8. Pets:none
9. List the 3-5 biggest things going on in your life:
-Greenpeace
-my non-love life
- Keeping my relationship with God
10. What did you go to school for? I was going for English,...now I am saving the world.....good trade
11. Parents: Don and Kathy Kettles.....they are still alive and kicking and doing yoga
12. Close Friends: wow...ummm everyone....at times I feel like the whole world is my friend......
13. Do you drink/smoke?: Well apparently it's cool to be a smoker at Greenpeace...but I am not...but I do like my beer
14. Tattoos/Piercings: ears and nose...no tattoos...yet
Also some guy asked me out while I was working yesterday. I still don't know how I really feel about dating. It's almost as if I don't want to date. The guy seems nice and he works in the best record shop in town so I figured it can't be that bad? Then again I think of where my heart really belongs and if it's really worth the risk of the chance of getting that back. Even though we (he and I) don't speak, God speaks to me everyday. I know I have told everyone I am over him...but really I just excepted that I have to live my life and I know in my heart overtime it'll all play out because God's got it. I can only take this dating thing one day at a time and pray he doesn't get attached.
It's only a movie....right?
contemplative- I am now twenty years old as of May 28th. Kind of weird because there is no real "woo hoo" about it.
- I drove 3000 miles in my 2000 Blue Bonnie named Cecelia...never done that before.
- I now live in L.A...Echo Park to be exact.
- I have the most amazing view
- I work for GREENPEACE, the worlds largest independant enviromentalist organization.
- and I love it
- I live in a city where there is not just ONE thing happening but thousands of things EVERY NIGHT
- I got myself a place to live in one week
- I managed to get a bed in days
- I have a bookshelf
- I am still in step one but managing
- It's official....I actually love my life
- end of story
The road trip was definately interesting.
We first went from Lansing to Des Moines, Iowa. We passed a Llama farm and then of course Chicago. Once we got to Iowa, We met some pretty cool cats at the Mars cafe in the heart of Drake University. Some fun times and great vegan nachos we had.
The next morning we drove from Des Moines to Denver, Colorado. Let me tell you about Nebraska.....hate it. I pretty much thought I was going to die in the middle of the plains. We were stuck in that waste of space for about 5 hours. Then we reached Denver and it was awesome.
We spent the next two nights in Denver visiting some relatives. For a whole day we dined in the most fabulous vegan/vegetarian restaurants and saw the excitement of the city. They have some great vintage stores if you are ever interested.
well I will post more later.....I have to go do some stuff
I leave everything in about 36 hours.
I am leaving my friends, family, school, and my past. I have deep Michigan traits rooted in my soul. I'm so excited and full of the possibilities that this will bring.
I am packed and ready to go.
The picture is the one in my userpic. Please someone tell me...do I look slutty in this picture? I thought it was artistic...and the guy gave me the nickname, "Blue Nails Collection".....Does that have some secret meaning that I don't know about!
I know it's just an idiotic Facebook thing, but it bothers me when something cute from my friends, turns into something dirty with guys some how objectifying my body....even if it wasn't shown. It's not that I am not used to men looking, but there is a big difference between seeing the person in person then online...it's just a creepy thing to wake up to.
confused"Hello Cutie".
it's going to be a good day.
bouncyI was talking my old teacher from high school and talking about all the good changes that are going to take place. In the back of my mind though I wished it were him, just sitting there and smiling back at me as I talked. I sent a letter that told him not to contact me. That letter was the hardest thing I had ever had to write. My soul, my heart and my faith was helping me stay strong and not break apart in my words. I wonder if I made the right choice, I wonder if he just threw that letter away...like the piece of paper it was. I wonder if he read it and cryed. I wonder if he's torn. I wonder if he was relieved. I wonder all of these things.
One of my favorite memories was a year ago when I met his friend Paul for the first time. We went to some seminar that was an hour away. we were all laughing and having such a great time. Then at the end of the night we were just talking while he had his hands on my waist. He played with my glasses....he used to love to do that, I think it was because I always squinted whenever he snatched them with his mouth and would try to run off with them. Unfortunately I am blind as a bat without them so I never got too far.
Ever since I wrote the letter I haven't been able to sleep. I just lay their praying for him and mostly for me. L.A is going to bring so many wonderful new opportunities. New people to meet and adventures to wake up to. Then again everywhere in the back of my mind I am going to be that one human being in the world that keeps him close to their heart...even though he did nothing to deserve it. I decided and felt called that it was time to let God heal him, but that doesn't mean my silence is truly silence. I don't talk to him, e-mail him, or text him, or do anything in direct contact, but I do talk to God about him. I realized that this was a different form of love, much deeper than any physical connection could ever bring a person to.
The message - John 4: 17-18
17-18God is love. When we take up permanent residence in a life of love, we live in God and God lives in us. This way, love has the run of the house, becomes at home and mature in us, so that we're free of worry on Judgment Day—our standing in the world is identical with Christ's. There is no room in love for fear. Well-formed love banishes fear. Since fear is crippling, a fearful life—fear of death, fear of judgment—is one not yet fully formed in love.
This passage gave me a new light on the how I am dealing with this whole situation. Sometimes I fear the person that is in his past. This fear however should not ever be a fear. We all have pasts, we all have made mistakes and we all have our flaws and inperfections, but God loves and we love anyways. If I let the my worries on what's going on get to me, I am not loving. To truly love is to not worry, so I talk to God. When I give my worries about him to God, he not only relieves me but loves me, allowing myself to still love and not be trapped with worry. I feel like this is the deepest form of love. I don't talk with him, as people we are silent, but in God we are heard.
Some days it's hard, and I miss him. Some days I worry, but soon enough the tide will wash away. I still love, everyday. I still pray, with all my heart and I remain strong, because God gives me no other choices. He's ruthless like that.
I have had 8 official boyfriends,
14 different men(I tried to remember the exact number) whom I have had sexual curiosities with,
and countless admirers.
where do I go from here.......
Sometimes it takes very little to entertain me for example.....
Moment #1
I walked into JCPenny to get something and I saw a shirt that read, " I thought being Eco-Friendly meant talking to my plants". What was even better was a lady actually bought it ten minutes later.
Moment #2
Driving in car back to home and on the Walgreens sign it reads, "zero calorie water sold here 3/ $3" ......isn't all water "zero calorie" if it isn't a sports drink?

grateful